Splatoon Global Testfire

This demo began at 11pm (BST) on Saturday 23^rd May, 2015.

Throughout their history, Nintendo have created games covering numerous categories. Platforming (Mario), real-time strategy (Pikmin) and community simulation (Animal Crossing) to name a few examples. However, they’ve never attempted an online multiplayer shooter. With the release of Splatoon tomorrow, that is about to change.

When watching the trailers, Splatoon looked very much like alien teenagers playing paintball on steroids. It didn’t make much sense to look at. Fortunately, the Global Testfire gave Wii U owners hands on playtime with an intriguing and genuinely innovative take on the genre.

First impressions were positive. The demo application loaded quickly with no problems. I was then asked to create a basic character, referred to as Inklings. Gender, eye colour and skin tone were the only options. Nothing fancy but the final version will apparently contain clothing stores that offer more possibilities for customisation.

It began with a single player tutorial stage. Dual thumbsticks controlled movement and turning, very familiar to anyone who’s played a modern third-person shooter. The only difference was the use of motion tilt for aiming. At first, I thought this was going to be another gimmick but it works very well with a few minutes of practice. By comparison, the control stick aiming was wild and surprisingly imprecise.

The Wii U GamePad triggers are well-used. The right trigger and shoulder button fires the weapon/sub-weapon respectively. My sub weapon was an ink grenade but others are available. The left trigger transforms your Inkling into a squid. Being in this form has many advantages if you are in ink matching your team colour. Movement speed is doubled, ink (ammunition) is regenerated and your squid can even travel under gates and up walls.

With the tutorial stage completed I was very impressed and excited for more. The GamePad screen even had an arcade style game to play whilst waiting for multiplayer to load. It was a reasonable time filler and much better than looking at a loading screen. Unfortunately, after having my fill of squid jumper the connection problems started.

Twitter was full of players having similar issues. #SplatoonGlobalMisfire and other sarcastic hashtags became popular. I even thought about cancelling this blog because it wouldn’t have been fair without experiencing multiplayer. Eventually an announcement was made about a one hour extension. I managed to log back in about 12:40am.

With these delays, three games of ‘Turf War’ was my meagre reward but this four-versus-four mode was honestly like nothing I have ever played before. After choosing from four weapons, it’s straight into the action. The focus is on marking territory with ink rather than ‘kills’. Regeneration is instantaneous; a fast travel mechanic only adds to the chaos. Whichever team makes more of a mess is the winner. A remarkably simple concept with excellent execution.

Weapons are suitably wacky, in tune with the colourful graphics that ran crisply without any sign of slowdown. The giant paint roller was popular, probably because it is effective at covering ground surfaces. Other choices fell into the machine gun and sniper rifle types, each with their own strengths, sub-weapons and special moves.

Teamwork is very fun and almost mandatory for success. Whilst using the roller, I was unable to wall climb because it was covered in opposition colours. A teammate armed with a Splatter shot noticed my difficulty and created a path that assisted my squid climb up the vertical surface. Strategically all bases are covered including stealth, aggression and sniping. Those intricate details will only evolve throughout the games lifespan.   

A few words of caution before considering a purchase, not including the potential server problems. The lack of single-player modes may be a negative. Campaign is estimated at 4-6 hours so if you’re not playing online it isn’t worth the price (£25-£35). Also, Splatoon is not yet ‘complete’ with only a limited selection of multiplayer options. Free updates and a major upgrade in August are scheduled so it might be best to hold back until then. If you played the demo and loved it, Nintendo will knock 10% off the digital download price for one week after release.

Splatoon deserves to be a hit but it is far too soon to say if the unique gameplay will catch on. If that happens, Nintendo fans may look back on this title like The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, Super Mario 64 or Metroid Prime. It is no exaggeration to say Splatoon could be the start of a franchise; one that is the standard bearer for generations to come.

WWE Payback 2015.

Broadcast live on 17/05/15 (USA timezone).

Overall, my partner and I were thoroughly entertained by most of the matches on the card. An impressive achievement considering the B-show nature of this event. Highlight of the night was either the fatal four way finale or Cena/Rusev depending on your preferences. Ladies tag and King Barrett/Neville were the only disappointments.

Without further delay, it’s time to review the show in greater detail.

Sheamus pinned Dolph Ziggler.

This was a solid opening contest that took a while to get going. It gradually shifted through the gears and had some decent near falls down the final stretch. Dolph got his ‘payback’ from Extreme Rules by smearing his arse cheek in Sheamus’s face. Glad that’s over and done with. Eventually, Ziggler came up bleeding after an ill-advised headbutt and fell victim to the Brogue Kick.

WWE Tag Team Championship.
Two out of three falls. New Day beat Cesaro & Tyson Kidd two falls to one.

Cesaro and Kidd took a 1-0 lead after their big swing into a dropkick combination. After this Kidd took a lengthy beating and Big E speared Cesaro through the ropes and onto the floor. That spot always looks impressive in replays. New Day levelled up after a botched double team move. In the last portion numerous false finishes thrilled the crowd, they chanted “this is awesome”. Then came the Xavier Woods switcheroo pin out of nowhere. My partner admonished the heels very loudly, some commentators criticised the ‘they look alike’ elements. I wasn’t bothered in the slightest, great match.  

Bray Wyatt pinned Ryback.

Ryback’s ribs took a hammering. Wyatt performed an impactful senton to the outside that seemed to cause his opponent great discomfort. Later on Ryback unexpectedly hit a big splash from the top rope. Those arsenal additions should be saved for bigger shows in my opinion. After a finisher reversal sequence, Bray drove the ‘Big Guy’ into the exposed turnbuckle and hit Sister Abigail for the victory.

United States Championship.
I Quit match. John Cena won after Lana gave up on behalf of Rusev.

Their forth match was a stunt-filled brawl and fitting feud-ender that protected Rusev’s toughness. The Russian hero dominated from the start but Cena recovered and they fought into the crowd. A security barrier, guardrail and even pyrotechnics were used as weapons. Back in the ring, Cena attempted to power out of the Accolade but failed and passed out. The referee didn’t stop the match so Rusev removed the ropes and revived Cena with water, big mistake! Super Cena locked in the STF (using the ropes for extra punishment), Rusev screamed in his mother tongue and sympathetic Lana (presumably able to translate) said: “He quits”.

Naomi & Tamina def. Bella Twins.

This wasn’t technically bad by any means. The major problem is how stale the Diva’s division has become; fresh talent from NXT is urgently required along with better storylines. Naomi won with the Rear View.

Neville beat King Barrett via count out.

Disappointing, it felt like they were holding back for a rematch. Predictably, that’s what happened the following night on Raw (Barrett won by taking advantage of Neville’s knee injury).In this glorified preview, Barrett deliberately got himself counted out then went back for a sneak attack. Neville countered with a suplex and hit Red Arrow for the ‘visual revenge’. Call me old fashioned but I like wrestling when television promotes PPV, not the other way round.

WWE World Heavyweight Championship.
Fatal Four Way. Seth Rollins retained against Randy Orton, Roman Reigns & Dean Ambrose.

It was too soon to realistically believe a title change was on the cards but everything in-between exceeded expectations. Kane’s drama was quickly resolved as he showed loyalty to The Authority. That left room for the memorable moments to breathe.

For a brief time, Rollins, Reigns and Ambrose reunited (as The Shield) to triple powerbomb Orton through the announcers table. Their unity didn’t last long. Ambrose and Reigns got revenge on their backstabbing ex-teammate by powerbombing Kane to squash the ‘sell-out’ who was laid out on the Spanish announcers table. Ambrose’s expressions during this portion were top class throughout especially during the “loser buys the beers” face-off with Reigns.

After lots of shenanigans and false endings, Rollins pinned Orton with a sloppy looking Pedigree. This was the right call; Orton won’t lose anything taking the fall and it keeps Reigns and Ambrose strong for future title opportunities. As for Rollins, will he get too big for his boots and start claiming to be better than Triple H in the near future? Watch this space.